chapter eleven: let them eat cake

i'd like to start off by sharing some rare and stimulating insights in my cosmic fabulosity. my best advice for any post workout wrap-up would be to multitask. like tonight, for example, i was hungry and i was also sore. so what conclusion and best time management practice could i use? eat in the shower. i'm not even joking, i had a full apple right inside my shower. all the way to the pit. and you know what? it was the total best. i saved time, and didn't even have sticky hands. i'd recommend it.

has anyone seen my headphones? seriously, this pisses me right off. i leave things generally in the same place, packed my bags for our run tonight, and couldn't find my headphones. how are you supposed to run for 40 minutes with no music, just wondering? i didn't even have a substitute, not a clarinet, no jazz flute, not even a boom box. i know two things, if i had an afro and a boom box i would have been all over the run tonight like a cheap suit. we headed down to the official EJ fire hydrant, and we were off like a herd of horses. one mile to the granville bridge. two minute rest. back to the start, two minute rest. back to the bridge, rest. and run home like it's the olympics says captain sparky.

being on the ghetto fabulous train this evening, i decided to make my run the most enjoyable possible. i would serenade myself with my own sweet, sweet song. i started with some will smith. "on your mark, ready, set, let's go..." i was also mentally in a great place tonight. i've been experimenting with my new found positivity towards running, and it's hard to get used to such a drastic change. it's a new lease on life. i've become increasingly sympathetic and supportive towards my body, it's becoming almost annoying. who knows, next i may start running in bright red lipstick soon.

so i made sure to inform sparks that i planned on keeping it 'easy' tonight. my legs have been on a hiatus, and apparently i've decided to be nicer to myself. so this was the plan. made our way out to get jiggy with it. first time out 9:04. 'see, i was taking it easy'. apparently that wasn't easy, that was 'good'. shit, try less. so we head back, and i did 9:39, i backed off successfully. baby got back. made our way out for round three. half way in, my calves reminded me that i wanted to pass out just like after a pie eating contest. i wish i could forgo the standard operating procedure of my legs and swap it for a way to do nothing in return. they'd just carry on without me, and i could potentially be reading a magazine while running around.

so here's the deal. i'm taking a week off running. i know, i know. take off your tutu and end this birthday party. but seriously, my calves make me want to get into rollerblading. rollerblading... fruit boots. what the? so the week off running it will be, lots of classes instead. maybe a little chicken too. by the way, i had cake for breakfast. let them eat cake. this little piggy went to strive, this little piggy went to cardio, this little piggy went to enduro, and this little piggy went running, running, running all the way home. and she's a cunning linguist. wow.